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February 1, 2004
BRANDED: Sponsors' marks are everywhere
By Buck Harvey | San Antonio Express-News
Hunter S. Thompson screamed scripture from the 20th-floor balcony of the Houston Hyatt, which was what everyone expected from him on the morning of the eighth Super Bowl.
"I had not planned a sermon for that morning," he wrote in Rolling Stone 30 years ago. "I had not even planned to be in Houston, for that matter. But now, looking back on that outburst, I see a certain inevitability about it. Probably it was a crazed and futile effort to somehow explain the extremely twisted nature of my relationship with God, Nixon and the National Football League."
Maybe Thompson actually screamed a sermon, and maybe he had gotten the words from a religious comic book he had found on the floor of the men's room, as he said he did. Maybe he also really did believe then that an 8-pound leech was attached to the base of his spine.
Either way, absurdity was hot at the time, and Thompson's Gonzo journalism delivered.
Thompson was The Good Doctor, famous enough to become a character in "Doonesbury." Thompson's career faded, though he still pumps out books and writes a short column for ESPN.com. But then, in Houston in 1974, he was never trendier. Coming off two Fear and Loathing epics, he howled as the voice of drugged absurdity.
He summed up Americana, with all its riches and all its perversions, and the Super Bowl made for a perfect backdrop.
Today?
His eyes would most likely glaze over still, but not because of anything he ingested. Instead, he would be overcome by the massive, corporate, high-tech nature of the Super Bowl.
There are certainly a few things to still fear or loathe. Thompson could throw down a few bloody marys and scream about this official NFL release: "Approximately 1,000 volunteers from Disaster Relief of Houston will be responsible for placing commemorative seat cushions into 75,000 seats in Reliant Stadium. The NFL will provide an honorarium for this group's services."
Disaster Relief has turned into buttock relief? If anyone should provide an honorarium, it should be the 75,000 fannies.
Then there's the Harris County Sheriff's Department permitting its deputies to wear specially designed badges for Super Bowl week. The nice civic touch comes with a $57 fee.
Thompson might even find a few of today's details crazier than those of 1974. For example, the halftime entertainment today will range from P. Diddy to Kid Rock to Nelly. The halftime entertainment 30 years ago was courtesy of the University of Texas band.
But that's just it. P. Diddy and the guys are here, as everyone seemingly is, for crossover, business-twisting reasons. You want to reach P. Diddy? The NFL supplies two phone numbers.
The NFL supplies everything, intertwining every conceivable alliance. On Monday, promoted with "MEDIA ALERT" across the top of a release, quarterback David Carr of the Houston Texans helped announce a new partnership between the NFL and the dairy industry.
Moo. As in money. The dairy industry people are probably here, with good seats, and they probably paid Bill Walsh $50,000 to speak at a luncheon.
These are the people who come to Super Bowls, not the football fans. And its exclusive on every level; you had to know someone to get party invitations.
Thompson would find there are more parties now, especially ones he couldn't get in to. But at least the interview sessions remain as he remembered them. As Thompson wrote 30 years ago: "For eight long and degrading days I had skulked around Houston with all the other professionals, doing our jobs (listening) to an endless barrage of some of the lamest and silliest swill ever uttered by man or beast."
The swill, long ago, could at least be delivered poolside. Now it comes in structured interview sessions, run on the schedule of the German railroad, with dairy-like announcements prepared for every afternoon. It's what prompted Houston to get back into this mix. The Super Bowl is less a slice of sport than it is modern business.
So if Thompson screamed scripture today from the 20th floor?
It would be sponsored by Gillette, with a brief Q-and-A afterward.